Violence Against Women: Why We Must Change the Narrative

Violence against women is a topic so complex that even those working in the field are still navigating it. But what exactly is violence against women, and why is it so important — and so different — from just “violence”?

Violence, in general, is an act that causes physical, psychological, or emotional harm to another person. But violence against women goes deeper than that. It is violence directed at women because they are women — rooted in centuries of gender inequality, power imbalances, and social norms that excuse or normalise control and harm.

It’s not just an act of aggression; it’s an act of discrimination. This makes it a form of gender-based violence, not merely individual harm.

Still confused? Welcome to the survivors’ world.

No matter what they do, survivors are questioned, blamed, or silenced. Stay quiet? “Why didn’t you tell anyone?” Speak out? “Why didn’t you leave sooner?”

This endless cycle of judgement keeps survivors trapped in shame, while the real issue — the violence itself — goes unchecked.

It’s time we change the conversation. Instead of asking “Why didn’t you leave?”, let’s say: “None of this was your fault.” “I believe you.”

Because no matter the circumstances, there is no excuse or reason for another person to intentionally hurt another human being.

Changing the Narrative: It’s Not on Women to Prevent Violence

We all have a responsibility to challenge this. For far too long, society has placed the responsibility for safety on women — telling them to watch their drink, cover up, stay in groups, and don’t walk home alone.

But how about we start changing the message? How about we say: Stop abusing women. Stop treating women as objects to use, control, or harm just to prove power or masculinity.

Why is the onus always on women to prevent violence, instead of on men — and society — to stop causing it?

When women go out — to work, to live, or heaven forbid, to have some fun — they’re not asking for something to happen to them that will change their lives forever. Yet society still acts as though it’s their fault when it does.

What’s even more heartbreaking is that about 80% of victims live with their abuser. Where is the awareness about that? Where are the messages that say, You don’t deserve this, This isn’t normal. This isn’t okay.

Too often, those messages are missing. Survivors are left doubting themselves — “Why didn’t I leave sooner?” “What did I do wrong?” “Could I have done something differently?”

The truth is — you did nothing wrong. The responsibility lies solely with the person who chose to harm you.

Where Do We Go From Here?

Change starts with all of us. We must call out harmful jokes, challenge victim-blaming attitudes, and support survivors with compassion rather than judgment. We need to raise boys and men to understand that strength is not control — it’s respect, empathy, and equality.

Let’s shift the focus where it belongs: Not on women to protect themselves, but on society to stop excusing, stop normalising, and stop enabling violence.

Because every woman deserves to live free from fear, blame, and harm — and it’s on all of us to make that happen.

💜 Join the Conversation

We can all play a role in ending violence against women — by listening, believing, and speaking up. It starts with changing how we talk about it and how we teach others to see it.

Let’s move from “How can women stay safe?” to “How can we make a world where they don’t have to be afraid?

#EndViolenceAgainstWomen #ChangeTheNarrative #GenderEquality #StopVAW #IBelieveYou #SurvivorSupport #HumanRights #NoExcuseForAbuse #BreakTheSilence #SocialChange

Lisa Walsh